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WEEK 31 – RELATIONAL LEADERSHIP
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WEEK 31 – RELATIONAL LEADERSHIP
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WEEK 31 – Relational Leadership
The best model of leadership we have every been given was from Jesus Himself.
He’s our model for everything as Christians.
We are following Him, so if there is ANYTHING we are wanting to do, we need to look at how Jesus did it, and follow His example.
When it comes to leadership, he obviously modeled servant leadership, which we’ve talked about before.
But He also modeled relational leadership.
He didn’t just lead from His title, GOD. haha.
Philippians 2:1-11 actually says that He laid down His title in order to meet us relationally.
Jesus could have very well came on the scene and demanded respect because He was God.
He could have come in saying, “I have this title, you have to honor me and respect me, & do what I say.”
But He didn’t do that.
He laid down His title in order to move from leading from title to leading from relationship.
If people follow you because of your title, there is only so much loyalty that can come from that.
But once you move into serving the people, getting to know the people on their level, showing interest in their lives, being among the people… THAT’S WHEN you start to win their loyalty.
THAT’S WHEN you move from leading from title to leading from relationship.
And THAT’S WHEN you step in to true leadership.
YOU’LL SEE IT EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK FROM NOW ON.
You’ll see it with your kids, at work, at school, with friends, in the military, at church, in books & movies.
No matter where you look, the best leaders are those that move from not only leading from title, but leading from relationship.
Build the relationship & you will win their loyalty. Win their loyalty, and you will accomplish a shared mission.
PLUS you’ll have a blast doing it together this way.
God’s ways are always better, don’t you think?
Anybody can hold a title, but not everybody can win the true loyalty of the people… that takes moving from title based leadership to relational based leadership.
I mean take a look at Jesus.
He spent time with them. LOTS and LOTS of time with them.
He didn’t just tell them what to do.
In fact, He did things Himself for a good while before He ever sent them out to do it too.
He modeled the way.
He served them.
Which are both KEY ingredients to relational leadership.
Don’t get me wrong.
Sometimes it’s important to lead from title, take a stand, and demand that people fall in line with your decision.
But those instances are few and far between, and if you want the people to stay loyal then you better make sure that your decision is in their best interest AND that is communicated well after the fact.
There are some emergency situations where I have had to bark orders in a dangerous scenario on a mission trip, or when someone was blatantly rebelling in front of the whole team.
Sometimes people have to know what you will allow & what will not be tolerated.
But again, they have to know WHY the team will work better with that type of respect in place.
And again AGAIN, it is so much more in your favor if those instances happen AFTER you have spent intentional time investing in them, building your report.
You can look at it like a relational bank account.
Every demand you make from title is going to be a withdrawal on the account.
So if you want that account to thrive after the fact, you peter make sure there has been sufficient “funds” in that relational bank account before hand.
You want your people (family, kids, team, etc.) to know without a shadow of a doubt that you are for them, that they can trust you, and that even when friction does come, you are going to be a safe place to work that out and continue together even stronger than before.
That can only be modeled, and it can only be won over time of investing relationally with your people.
Spending your time with them will communicate that they are valuable to you, that they are your purpose, and that you see your role (parent, boss, pastor, etc.) with the purpose of serving and equipping them, and accomplishing the mission together as a team.
They do need to know that the mission is worth it and super important. But they also need to know that they are apart of that mission and are important.
So on one hand they are dispensable in that to be on this team, this is how we operate. But on the other hand they are not dispensable, because they are valuable and you love them and want them with you, and you have an important role for them to play in accomplishing the mission together.
So YES, you’ll have to have a mission as a team, a family, a business, a ministry, etc.
We’ll talk more about that later.
But for now, keep looking at Jesus and learning from Him to see how to approach your leadership roles.
Don’t cling to your title and demand respect. It won’t work for long.
Serve the people. Love the people. Get down into the trenches with the people. Be on mission with the people. Get dirty with the people. Add value to their lives. Have fun together. Build relationships with them as individuals.
And you will see, just like Jesus & His disciples, that you start to lead from relationship, and the bond will be so much tighter.
You’ll still have to lead courageously, with strength, honor, vision, boldness, etc.
But a crucial ingredient will be winning the loyalty of the people through relationships & care by getting on their level and spending time with them.
Don’t just lead from above, lead from amongst.
There’s so much to leading others, and like we always say, it starts with leading yourself.
Let’s keep our eyes on Jesus & let Him show us how to lead our lives better AND how to lead our people better.
QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF
- List out the places where you are in some form of a leadership role?
- On a scale of 1-10 with 1 being leading completely from title & 10 being leading completely from relationship, where would you rate your leadership in those areas (make a different rating for each leadership role you are in).
- How could you spend more of your time & priority actually WITH your people to invest in that relational bank account?
- How do you see that Jesus modeled this to us? Where in Scripture do you see Him modeling relational leadership?
- How do you see that developing a tighter bond with His people?
- How do you see that accomplishing their mission better?
SCRIPTURE
Philippians 2:1-11 / Jesus through out the Gospels
WEEKLY FOCUS
This week, read through these Scriptures each morning.
Think about this idea of LEADING FROM RELATIONSHIP.
Ask God if there are any areas you need to surrender or change in order to move out of leading only from title and into relational leadership.
Let this theme guide your God time all week, and even your thoughts and conversation with Him through out your days, all week long.
Let Him speak to you about this idea of LEADING PEOPLE RELATIONALLY, and see what He says.
We’d love to hear your feedback, so hop into the devos conversation thread in SLACK & we’re excited to see what the Lord speaks to you this week.
BLESSINGS!
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